Have Blessed Weekend...

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Esmé's Mommy here...

So often I hear other Christians talk about their pursuit of perfection...  and how they are almost there, or how they are constantly feeling that inner peace.  "Be like me!" they say.  "Don't underestimate God's power to keep you from sinning.  To keep you in a blissful state of mind."  Sometimes I wonder if I'm missing something.

But usually I have a sense of foreboding - because when you start to feel content with where you are, you can be sure something drastic will happen to rock your boat.

Staying in God's perfect will isn't going to be possible until we experience His resurrection, I'm afraid.  Not that we shouldn't strive, but it is ONLY by His grace we are saved.  And on this present earth, in our present condition, we are reminded of that daily, moment by moment.  Thank God it is all about Him, not about us.

I read this today:

God says, My power is sufficient to keep you from falling off the narrow road. But on that road you will feel, more acutely sometimes than others, the unbearable ache of repeated failure to love, of always falling short of My glory.

Don't be surprised by your failure. Instead, be surprised, staggered by My response. 

Read the rest at 66 Love Letters by Dr. Larry Crabb.

Here's to a surprising, staggering weekend!

Reflections Part 2

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Esmé's Mommy here.

Remember that post I wrote about the twilight zone?

Well, I'm still in the twilight zone, thanks for asking... If anything, that darn music is only playing louder!

And how am I dealing with it? Well, I left off saying I choose to enjoy the moments - I choose joy! And I have been doing this. I've been finding incredible joy in those late night moments with Esmé; the sweet hugs and funny giggles and even the tears. The bunnies make me grin. The juicy mangos make my tummy happy. The landscape is turning vivid, vibrant green with recent rains.

I don't think about the twilight zone. I ignore it, and I am happy. Life is so busy that I can do this much of the time.

But when I slow down and am reminded of the twilight zone, I feel unsettled. I keep longing for resolution, for knowledge of the outcome. I am not embracing this particular aspect of my life, and that makes me feel guilty in a way.

Should I be embracing it? Relishing the fire that is searing my flesh in its refining process? Or should I keep longing? Longing for God's perfect will to finally, one day, be complete in me, and to finally understand why?

I felt a connection with Octamom's post regarding the seemingly senseless death of a young friend, a beautiful flower in God's garden, mowed down far too soon from our perspective.

Yet God has a plan, friends. It encompasses eternity. And in the vastness of eternity, the trials we deal with today are infinitely small. And one day, we will see how these infinitesimal trials all fit into His master plan.

On this, the day after Thanksgiving, I am thankful for a great God. I am thankful for His refining fire. But I do not want to stay here forever. I long to move on, and to know, and to get rid of this senseless twilight tune in my head.

For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known. 1 Corinthians 13:12

Reflection

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In honor of PhotoHunt's reflection theme today, Mommy thought it would be fun to stick me in the bathroom sink (the only spot where I can see a mirror). The things we do for fun in this house...
It wasn't too bad - we did the Look in the Mirror rhyme several times:

Look in the mirror.
What do you see?
I see a baby
Looking at me.
I touch my nose,
And so does she.
That's not just any baby,
That baby is me! Wishing you a reflectful and restful weekend!